


Possession

by gmariam19 (gmariam)



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: BAMF Leia Organa, Eventual Poe Dameron/Finn, Force-Sensitive Finn (Star Wars), Force-Sensitive Rey, Gen, Injured Poe Dameron, M/M, Minor Poe Dameron/Finn, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, POV Poe Dameron, Possession, Sad Leia Organa
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-14
Updated: 2020-09-18
Packaged: 2021-03-07 01:33:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 10,177
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26464963
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gmariam/pseuds/gmariam19
Summary: Weakness. Fear. Shame.Give in, whispers the ruthless voice within. You can't win. You will fail, just as you did before.He knows this truth, and yet he will never give up. He is no match for the powers of the Force leveled against him, and yet somehow he clings to the spark at the center of his soul, just enough to refuse and reject. To remain himself.But he cannot fight forever. Soon, the darkness will claim him for good.As the Resistance settles on Ajan Kloss, Poe struggles with more than nightmares of his time with Kylo Ren.
Relationships: Poe Dameron & Finn, Poe Dameron & Leia Organa, Poe Dameron & Rey, Poe Dameron/Finn
Comments: 34
Kudos: 62





	1. Chapter 1

One

_Darkness. Pain. Laughter._

_Tendrils of shadow surround him, coil around his wrists, his ankles, his waist. He gasps, inhaling inky blackness, choking on it as he tries to scream and then chokes even more. Thrashing against his spectral bonds, he pushes back with all his strength of will, hoping it is enough._

_Tonight, it is. He can move once more, draw in clean air, sob in relief. Tonight, he is free._

_One day he will not be able to resist, and he will be taken, just as he was before._

* * *

Poe is exhausted.

Everyone is. The entire Resistance collectively collapsed about a week after they settled on Ajan Kloss. He's pretty sure some of his pilots slept for two days straight; even Leia took some time and sequestered herself on the _Tantive IV_ for longer than he'd ever known her to step away. Rey claimed a section of the cave and curled up, and Finn—full of boundless energy and optimism-dragged for several days, memorably falling asleep in his breakfast one morning. Rey still teases him about it.

But that was weeks ago, and as they began to pull together the vague outlines of a working Resistance—and as it seemed more and more likely they wouldn't be chased off Ajan Kloss—everyone began to come back to life, in a way. Hope blossomed, and the spark grew. Only Poe doesn't quite feel it; he's still exhausted.

He's working hard, yes. That's the one thing he can do, what gets him through his day. Fighting, flying, clean, and endless planning and strategizing—whatever he can do to bring them closer to victory, to end this war. To go back to normal.

Not that Poe has any illusions that his life will ever be normal again.

Work doesn't tire him, it fires him up, inspires him, keeps him going day after day. It's the nights that leave him drained, more tired when he wakes than when he lays down. Because sleep is harder than any battle now; he craves it, yet he dreads it. Every night he hopes he will make it through to morning, free of his demons, and every night he fails. The demons attack.

One demon, anyway.

* * *

_Gloved hands reach toward him, inside him. Sorting through thoughts and memories like sifting through sand. Tossing away the love, the joy, keeping only the pain and heartbreak. Forcing him to remember, relive._

_Laughing, mocking, relishing his agony._

_He claws his way toward the light, toward the good he knows, toward the love he feels. He clings to it—to his grandfather, his parents, his friends. To Leia._

_There is rage, at that last—ferocious, seething rage._

_And then emptiness, nothing but emptiness._

* * *

Poe had nightmares for weeks after the _Finalizer_ , after returning from Jakku. And then they subsided. He thought he was over it, moving on to the next fight, leaving the past behind. But once they settled on Ajan Kloss, the sleepless nights began to return. The irony burns, that living in relative safety and obscurity has somehow left him feeling more vulnerable, allowing his fears back in. He hates it.

He knows it's more than nightmares this time. Waking in the middle of the night in terror, it is more than his damaged psyche running wild in the dark. It is Ren, he's sure of it: working his way back into Poe's mind, creeping in through the silence of sleep. Somehow, Poe is able to fight him off, but he's knows that eventually, the distance between them won't protect him any longer. Poe will be worn down enough, and Ren will grow strong enough, for him to enter and do his will.

He should talk to Leia. He _wants_ to talk to Leia, and yet how can he confess such a thing? That Ben Solo, her _son_ , the boy Poe once met on Yavin IV and played with under the limbs of the Force tree—how can he tell her that Kylo Ren is invading his mind? Again? It proves he's a failure, for one: he was captured, broken, and now it's happening once more. And it would break her heart, to know what evil her son is capable of inflicting. She suspects, but that's different than watching it happen right before her.

So Poe resists, every night, and he is exhausted.

* * *

_Weakness. Fear. Shame._

_Give in, whispers the ruthless voice within. You can't win. You will fail, just as you did before._

_He knows this truth, and yet he will never give up. He is no match for the powers of the Force leveled against him, and yet somehow he clings to the spark at the center of his soul, just enough to refuse and reject. To remain himself._

_But he cannot fight forever. Soon, the darkness will claim him for good._

* * *

His squadron notices, and each of them ask him about it—Snap while they're working on his ship, Jess while they're sitting around the fire. BB-8 pesters him constantly, and even Finn talks to him one day at lunch when Poe practically falls asleep sitting up. They're all genuinely concerned, and Poe hates worrying Finn more than anyone, but it's not like he can talk to any of them about it. He's on his own.

He's picking at his breakfast, pushing it around his plate and downing another cup of caf as he stares at the datapad in front of him, unseeing. He doesn't even notice when Rey sits down across from him until she waves her hand in front of his face several times, looking both worried and amused.

Poe doesn't want more concern and plasters a smile on his face. "Hey, Jedi girl. Sorry, I was reading." He gestures at the datapad, which has gone dark because he was staring at it for so long.

Rey clearly doesn't believe him and raises an eyebrow. "Really? About what?"

He's caught, and Poe laughs, taking another sip from his mug. "No idea," he admits. "I wasn't paying attention."

"You were sleeping with your eyes open again," Rey says. She attacks her meal with enthusiasm, much as she always does. Poe sort of likes watching how much Rey enjoys such normal things, from regular meals, to the sounds of the jungle around them, to the freedom to do what she wants now. It's innocent and endearing, and reminds him to remember where he came from.

"I was not," Poe argues. He takes a bite of whatever's on his plate, but it's cold, and he leaves it with a shrug. He's not hungry anyway. "I was resting my brain."

Rey rolls her eyes, finishes what she's eating, and sets her fork down. "Can I be honest with you?" she asks, leaning forward and lowering her voice.

"Er, sure," Poe tells her. Even though they're not that close, he's pretty sure he knows what she's going to say. "Something tells me I couldn't stop you anyway."

Rey studies him, opens her mouth, shuts it, then tries again. "Finn's worried about you," she says. "I know we only met a few months ago, and you're much closer to him, but he's tried to talk to you. Everyone has."

"So now it's your turn?" Poe asks dryly.

She nods, ignoring the sarcasm. "You seem different from when we first met. Since we set up camp here."

Poe is already itching to get up, to leave, to run from it all, but tries to shrug it off. "Don't know what you mean. We've been here almost a month, settling in, getting to know the place—"

"And everyone else is settled," she says. "No one else looks as unsettled as you do, Poe. No one else looks as tired and sad."

Poe's eyes flick up in wide surprise. "I'm not sad," he starts, because that's not it at all, but Rey cuts him off.

"Something's going on," she says. "I don't know you, and yet I can tell. I can feel it. If you don't want to talk about it with me, maybe you should talk to one of your pilots, or Finn, or Dr. Kalonia. Or to the General," she adds, watching Poe for a reaction. Poe shakes his head, and Rey reaches out toward him, lowering her voice even more. "Look, I know it's hard. I didn't want to either, but the last few months have been a lot for me, too. Maybe she can help you."

Poe hadn't realized Rey was struggling, that she had talked to Leia; he feels bad for not noticing, but then, Rey holds her cards close, while Poe has always struggled to keep his to himself. He's thought about talking to Leia, of course he has. She kept a close eye on him after Jakku and the disaster of Crait, but this is different. She can't help him with Ren, with what happens in the middle of the night. And she shouldn't have to. It's her son that's doing this to him.

"It's nothing," Poe tells her, running a hand over his face and trying to smile. "Nightmares. They keep me up, so I'm tired. They'll go away, they always do." He doesn't think these will, but maybe if he says it enough, he can at least convince someone else.

Rey studies him closely. "Something's different about these, though," she says. "What's changed?"

Poe feels cornered, torn between wanting to talk and wanting to run. He decides to do both when he sees some of the other pilots come in for breakfast. "I can't talk about it here," he says, his voice low. "Not now, in front of—"

"Let's leave, then," Rey says, standing before Poe even finishes his sentence. She grabs some bread from her plate, downs her juice, picks up her tray. "Come on," she says. "Let's go for a walk."

Poe has never been so glad to be told what to do. They clear their trays and Poe follows her from the ship, through the cave, and out into the jungle of Ajan Kloss. It's still early so it's not too hot, though it's still humid. The base is coming alive, with people working on clearing the area, repairs to their small fleet of ships, planning and training—all the normal activities of the Resistance, but instead of in a concrete military hangar, they are outside, working to the soundtrack of the jungle.

Rey leads them away from the landing area, not too far from the base but far enough for privacy. They stop in a small clearing. No one is around, and Rey sits down on a log, motioning to Poe to join her. He shakes his head, and Rey sighs.

"Okay, so what's different now, that it's bothering you so much you can't sleep?"

Poe paces, blows out a long, nervous breath, and finally stops, staring at the ground as if it will be easier to speak to the dirt than to Rey. "It's Ren," he finally says. "I think…I think he's trying to break into my mind. Again." He winces as he says it, because it means admitting what happened to him on the _Finalizer_. She knows—he'd joked about it once—but that was months ago. He should have moved on, and he did, only now Ren is back. The feeling of weakness and shame in confessing his sleepless nights bows his shoulders.

Rey is immediately on her feet, standing close, reaching out as if to touch his arm, but pulling away. She's been with the Resistance for several month now, but Poe noticed immediately that she is not nearly as tactile as the rest of them. "Kylo Ren? You mean, you're having nightmares about him, from when you were captured, or…"

"No, it's not nightmares," Poe says. "It feels more physical, more…real, if that makes sense. I'm not dreaming about him attacking me, I think he really _is_ attacking me. Somehow. From the other side of the galaxy."

He turns and starts pacing. It sounds utterly ridiculous, and yet he knows it's true. And he knows that Rey has faced Ren, twice now, so maybe she will understand. Finn once said there was something strange between her and Ren, some kind of connection that transcended their relationship as enemies. Poe stops and turns to find Rey standing and staring at him with a frightened look on her face.

"What is it?" he demands. "What's wrong?"

"I can feel him, too," she whispers. "In my mind. I can see him, hear him."

"Shit, he's doing it to you too?" Poe hurries back over to her, takes her arms. "Are you okay? Did he hurt you?"

Now she's confused, like he's talking nonsense. "No, he didn't he…it's complicated. It's some sort of connection through the Force, I think. It started when I was training with Master Luke…" She trails off. "Poe, are you Force sensitive?" she whispers, as if it's some sort of secret. She sounds hopeful, and he hates disappointing her.

"No," he says. "Not like you. I grew up around it, though." He believes in the Force, and knows that it touches him, and sometimes he'd like to think he even feels that touch. But he'll never be a Jedi; he was born to be a pilot.

She looks both sad and confused, and he keeps talking before she can pepper him with questions. "This is different, I think. I don't see him, but I feel him trying to break into my mind. Every night." Saying it brings the exhaustion to the front of his mind, and he sits down on the log, elbows to his knees, staring at the ground again. He feels Rey sit next to him.

"Every night?" she asks. "What do you do?"

"I fight it off," he tells her. "On the _Finalizer_ …I couldn't fight him. I think the only reason I can now is because he's not right here. But it's getting harder and harder. He's getting stronger. I can't do it much longer—and I don't know what's going to happen when he wins. I don't know what he wants—to kill me, or…" _Worse,_ he thinks.

"Nothing is going to happen," Rey says immediately, and she takes his hand, prompting him to look up in surprise. "Because we won't let him. You should talk to Leia, Poe. She can help."

"He's her son," Poe says. "I don't want to do that to her. It's hard enough for her as it is, knowing what he's done…what he did to Han…"

"I know," she says. "But she still has hope, you know. That there is good in him."

"Rey, what he's done…" Poe cuts off in frustration. "What he's _doing_ to the galaxy, to me…maybe there is good in him, somewhere, but we still have to stop him. And I need to stop whatever he's trying to do to me every night, before I'm no good for the fight."

"Maybe I can help you," she says.

Hope flares, but also skepticism, and more than anything, fear for her safety. "How?" he asks.

"I don't know," she admits. "What if I come down to your room tonight? So that I can understand what he's doing, how he's doing it—help you fight back."

"Oh, there will definitely be some talk about you spending the night in my room," he jokes, but she only rolls her eyes.

"People already talk about me, and none of it matters, so I don't care." Poe is impressed with both her pragmatism and strength of character. "I'm trying to help a friend."

He sighs. "Right. Sorry. Well, er…" He's honestly not sure what to say: he both wants her help and doesn't, but more than anything, he's still not sure what she can do and doesn't want to put her at risk. "Look, if you're just going to wake me up, I've got BB-8 for that," he says. "It's more than that, I need…"

"You need someone to push him out of your mind," she says. "Maybe I can do that." She pauses, looks uncertain. "At least, I can do it for myself, so it shouldn't be too hard to …" She trails off, and he pats her knee.

"You have no idea, do you?" he asks, and this time it is her turn to sigh.

"Leia is training me," she says. "But like you, I don't want to burden her with too much. I have no many questions, but there's no one else to ask about it. Half the time I feel like I'm on my own, trying to figure out things the best I can."

"I've felt like that since the day I left home," Poe tells her. "I guess we're in this together, then. I wish I could be more help, but if it's a Force thing, I'm out of my league."

"You've fought him so far. We'll figure the rest out together," she says. "I'll see you tonight?"

He nods, and they walk back to the base in comfortable silence. He still has his doubts, and fears he may be dragging Rey into something that will only hurt her. He hopes a busy day wil keep his mind from whatever shadows the night may hold—and that together, they can defeat Kylo Ren.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading. I would love to know what you think of the opening!


	2. Chapter 2

Two

Black Squadron is sent out later that day to check out reports of unusual First Order activity in the Outer Rim. Poe doesn't have a chance to tell Rey he'll be gone for at least a day or two; he only hopes that whatever happens to him at night doesn't happen when he's out on a mission. It hasn't yet, which makes him wonder if it's something about Ajan Kloss that draws Kylo Ren to him in the darkness.

The mission goes well, which for them means minor damage, minimal injuries, and even some decent intel. Strangely enough, Poe feels more rested than usual when he returns, thanks to three nights of uninterrupted sleep—including one on Yavin IV, where he stopped to see his father. No nightmares, no attacks, nothing. It almost makes him more worried for what his return may bring.

Both Finn and Rey are waiting for him when he lands. Rey clearly wants to talk, and is practically bouncing on her toes with energy, but keeps looking awkwardly at Finn.

Finn glances between them before he claps Poe on the shoulder. "I'm glad you made it back safe. I'll see you at dinner, right?"

"Absolutely, buddy," Poe tells him. "I need to clean up and report to the General."

"I'll go with you," Rey says, and Finn frowns.

"You're going with him to clean up?"

"No, of course not!" she exclaims, and Poe thinks she might be blushing. "To see the General!"

"Right. Okay." Finn is definitely suspicious. "Well, I've got to get back to the armory. See you soon."

Poe nods and watches Finn leave. He hates keeping secrets from Finn, even if it's not a secret, it's just _personal._ Which makes it even stranger that Rey knows, since they are not nearly as close. It feels like he and Rey are hiding something, and hiding it from Finn makes it even worse.

Rey steps in front of him. "Finn thinks something's going on."

"Of course he does," Poe sighs. She's confirmed his worst fear. "He's a smart man."

"No, I mean, between us," she says. "He saw us walking before you left, and apparently I asked about you too much while you were gone."

"You did?" He grins. "Worried about me?"

"As a matter of fact, yes—I had another vision!"

"Ren came to you?" Poe hisses, lowering his voice and leaning closer. "What happened?"

"Nothing happened, only…" She glances around, motions him to the back of his X-wing. "I could sense he was looking for something—not me, and not Leia. I think he was looking for you."

"Shit," Poe says. "So it's something about this place, this planet, because he didn't find me while I was gone."

"He'll probably try again tonight, now that you're back."

Poe rubs his face. "I was afraid of that. I had three good nights of sleep while I was gone—nothing at all. Almost forgot what it was like not to wake up sweating and swearing."

Rey looks chagrined. "Oh Poe, I'm so sorry. We'll figure it out. I promise."

"Tonight is as good a night as any," he says. "I do have to clean up and report to the General, though." He grins. "And you don't have to follow me around, he only shows up when I'm asleep."

"Right," she says, stepping back. "Okay. I'll see you at dinner, then." BB-8 rolls up to them then and beeps a question at Poe and Rey.

"Of course, buddy," he says. "You go see R2. I don't need you to shower, and we'll see Rey tonight. She's going to be hanging out with us later, okay?"

BB-8 trills in excitement and rolls away. Poe walks back to the cave with Rey, continuing to the _Tantive IV_ to see Leia. He should probably clean up, but feels like he needs to see her first.

"Thank you, Poe," she says when he's finished with his report. "I'm glad you had a chance to see your father. I trust he's doing well?"

"He's still going strong," Poe tells her. "And he sends his love."

She smiles sadly, eyes looking back into the past. When she glances back at him, she raises an eyebrow. "You seem to be doing better," she offers. "Apparently long hauls out to the Outer Rim agree with you."

Poe laughs, hoping it doesn't sound nervous. "Maybe," he says. "I guess I slept better than expected, especially in my own bed."

"Of course," she says, walking him to the door of her office on the ship. "But Poe, I don't want to send you to the other side of the galaxy for a good night's sleep. If something's bothering you, I'm always here to talk."

"I know," he says, and in any other circumstance, he would probably take her up on it. Not this time. Not when it's Kylo Ren, her own son. He and Rey will figure it out. As if reading his mind, she gives him another piercing look.

"Rey asked about you several times while you were gone," she says. "I must admit, I'm curious if you—"

"No," Poe stops her before she can even suggest it. "Not at all, General. Nothing more than a mutual interest in BB-8 and the _Falcon_."

"Of course," she murmurs. "Well, I'm glad, because you two are—"

"Just friends," Poe assures her.

"I was going to say far too similar in your mulish stubbornness and hardheaded obstinacy, but friends works, too. And how's Finn?"

"What?" Poe asks, confused by the nonsequitur.

"Our heroic former Stormtrooper?" she reminds him. "The one who rescued you? Who also asked about you while you were gone?"

"He did?" Poe asks, trying not to grin. "Well, er, I saw him when we landed and he's good. I guess." For some reason, his face feels unusually warm. Probably because the idea of Finn asking about him is totally different than Rey asking about him.

"He certainly is," Leia says. She has that look on her face that Poe recognizes as the one where she knows something he doesn't—and she's not going to tell him. "We're lucky to have him. Make sure you tell him. Dismissed, Commander."

Poe nods, still confused, and hurries to his own room on the ship. It's little more than a private bunk, half the size of his room on D'Qar: a small bed, an even smaller desk with a stool. There's a closet on one side for his belongings, and a door opposite that leads to a shared fresher. Poe grabs some fresh clothes, jumps in the fresher, and takes his time cleaning up, trying not to think about what might happen now that he's back on Ajan Kloss.

He has some free time before dinner and wanders the base, checking in on his other pilots, catching up with Chewbacca, and stopping to talk to Rose Tico. She is one of their best engineers and yet she has no idea how good she is; he is amazed by how much she accomplished in the few days he was gone. They talk for so long that he is almost late for dinner and manages to convince her into taking a break and joining them.

It's strange, how quickly things can change: three days ago, he was exhausted and upset. After three nights away with his squadron, he actually feels refreshed, and dinner with Finn, Rey, and Rose is one of the best times he's had since the move to Ajan Kloss. He eats more than he has for days, talks, laughs, and for several hours, almost forgets what the night will bring.

It's probably one reason he lingers for so long. Rose leaves first, and then Rey stands, giving him a very pointed and impatient look before she goes. Poe nods, but makes no move to return to his bunk. He'd rather spend time with Finn…who is looking at him with an expression Poe can't quite read, but Finn clearly expects him to.

"What?" he asks.

"All right, what is it?" Finn asks, leaning forward. "Something's going on, between you and Rey. You were awfully close before you left, she was constantly asking about you—"

"Constantly?" Poe interrupts. Finn rolls his eyes.

"Frequently. And you've had this weird thing going since you got back."

"What weird thing? Maybe she's glad to see me."

"Since when?" Finn retorts. "If you were arguing, then I'd know everything is normal. You're not. There's looks and hugs and—it's weird! What's going on?"

"Nothing, buddy, honestly."

"You sure?" Finn asks. "Because if there is, you can tell me." He pauses, leans even closer. "Even if it's, well, personal. Between you and Rey. It's okay to tell me, you know."

"Personal?" Poe echoes. "Oh, you mean—"

"Are you?" Finn asks, though he sounds reluctant to hear the answer.

"Absolutely not," Poe tells him emphatically. "The General asked me the same thing!"

"Good, because it would be weird," Finn says, sounding relieved and nodding in agreement. "So what's really going on, then?"

Poe sighs, taps the table several times as he looks away and tries to figure out what to say. He decides to be honest, for the most part.

"I'm having trouble sleeping," he says. He hopes he sounds casual, adds a shrug for effect. "Rey's helping me out."

Finn's eyebrows about fly off his head and too late, Poe realizes how bad it sounds. "No, no, not like that!"

"I didn't say anything." Finn's sounds both amused and scandalized.

"I can hear you thinking it," Poe mutters. "It's…it has to do with the Force, I think. So Rey is going to…well, I'm not exactly sure what she's going to do. I don't think she knows."

Finn frowns. "What about the General? She's been training Rey, why don't you go to her?"

Poe shakes his head. "I don't want to bother her," he says. "And I know that sounds incredibly irresponsible, but she's been through so much, and she's got so much more to do, and…"

"And?"

For some reason, Poe finds himself telling Finn everything. "And I think it has to do with Kylo Ren. From, well—that day we met on the _Finalizer._ I think …" He shakes his head. "Something is happening to me, and I _know_ it's him. Rey's faced him twice now. She might be the only one who can stop it."

The look on Finn's face is one of anger, of fear, and of compassion. He reaches out and takes Poe's hand. Poe glances down in surprise, but squeezes back and meet's Finn's eyes.

"Anything you need," Finn says, his voice low and intense. "Anything—I will do it. You need a guard outside your door, I'm there. You need me to go after him, I will. Anything, Poe. You could have told me. I'm your friend, I'd do anything to help you."

Poe's throat feels tight: first Rey, now Finn. And while Rey hadn't been nearly as effusive in her support, Finn's concern and determination to help is so strong, Poe doesn't know what to say, what to feel. He nods, swallowing thickly and trying not to let his eyes water. He blinks several times and finally finds the words. "Thanks, pal," he manages. "I…I can't tell you how much that means to me. And that I feel the same way."

"I know you do," Finn says very matter-of-factly. "And I also know you probably won't take me up on it, so don't be surprised if I follow you around and show up in random places to check on you."

A laugh explodes from Poe like a bark, and he covers his mouth quickly. "I can take care of myself, you know."

"Not if you need Rey's help," Finn tosses back. "And I may not be a Jedi, but two friends at your back are always better than one, right?"

"Right," Poe murmurs, and he sighs. "I don't know what you can do, though. Hopefully Rey can sort it." He doesn't say anything else, but Finn nods as if he knows.

"Yeah, she's got this weird thing with Ren. I worry about her."

"She didn't say much," Poe admits. "I don't think it's the same, though."

"She hasn't said much to me either," Finn tells him. "It's more what she doesn't say, you know? But she's strong, Poe. She's learning the Force, and if anyone can help you with this stuff, it's her." He pauses. "Or the General."

"I know, I know," Poe sighs. "If it comes to it, I'll talk to her. Right now, I just want to be able to sleep through the night."

Finn doesn't look convinced, though. "You want me to come down later?"

"No!" Poe exclaims. "Kriff, if people see you _and_ Rey sneaking into my room, there will definitely be talk!"

Finn grins. "Like we don't already talk about you!"

"Wait, what?" Poe asks, and Finn laughs, his eyes crinkling. He looks good when he smiles.

"I'm kidding. We all know you've only got eyes for your droid and your ship."

"Really?" Poe shakes his head. "Huh. Guess I need to get out more."

"We all do," Finn says. "And we will. When we win."

"When we win," Poe murmurs. He stands, nods toward the door, and they head out together. Poe glances sideways at Finn as they walk, holding back a smile. Somehow, Finn always manages to inspire Poe, to give him strength. With Finn and Rey on their side, Poe believes more than ever that they will win someday. For now, he's not thinking about Kylo Ren and paralyzing nightmares; instead, Poe thinks about the future, and Finn.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!


	3. Chapter 3

Three

Poe tosses and turns, and not because Ren is in his mind. He's normally not one to feel shy in front of anyone—he's sleeps, eats, even showers with his squadron on missions. Yet knowing Rey is there in the dark, in such a small space with him, is awkward. Not because she's a beautiful young woman, but because she's someone he doesn't know that well, yet mysterious and slightly intimidating in that she knows the Force like few others. Like Ren.

He's also worried for her: what if Ren is too much, too strong? What if she takes him on and is hurt? How could he ever face Finn, or Leia? Poe needs her help, but he also wants to protect her. He rolls over, considers sending her away, but she stops him before he can even open his mouth.

"I'm not leaving," she says into the dark.

"I wasn't going to—" he starts, but she stops him.

"Yes, you were," she says. "I can hear you shifting and sighing over there. Go to sleep, Poe. Otherwise I may as well leave if you're going to stay up all night."

He sits up. "Okay," he says. "I'm awake. You can go."

He can hear her sit up from her place on the floor as well. He hates being comfortable in his own bed, but sharing was clearly not an option and he hadn't even finished offering it to her before she'd curled up on the floor with several blankets. "And what happens when you can't keep your eyes open and fall asleep? What then?"

"I'll fight him off," Poe says. "Like I have been. This was a bad idea. I shouldn't have dragged you into it."

"I'm here," she says. "And I'm not leaving. Let me help, Poe. If this is about the Force, I can help!"

"No offense, but you've only been at it for a few months," he says, but he lays back down, staring at the ceiling. "That sounds sort of like flying through the Maw after one course at the Academy."

She huffs at him, but he's pretty sure she settles back down into her blankets. "The Force is different. And I've faced Ren before. I can do it again. Trust me."

Poe sighs. "I trust you, Rey. I'm just worried for you."

There is a long silence from the darkness. "I know," she says softly. "But I'm more worried about you, and so is Finn. And if you don't let me stay, I'll tell the General and then she'll be worried too."

He laughs, rolling over to his side and trying to get comfortable. "That was low," he says. "Okay, I'll go to sleep. You'll be ready if he shows up?"

"I'll know if he's here," she assures him. "Good night, Poe."

"Good night, Rey."

BB-8 beeps a soft good night from the corner where he was supposed to be powered down and charging, and Poe smiles to himself. He couldn't be much safer between the two of them, and only wishes Finn was there as well.

* * *

_Black fingers probe his mind, searching, testing, prying. He tenses, resisting with all the strength he can find within him._

_Laughter taunts him, as loud as if it is right there in the room._

You cannot keep me out forever.

_An evil whisper, sharp pain and anguish. Shadows swirling through his thoughts and memories – he is choking, gasping, thrashing—_

Rey!

_There is raging fury beyond anything he's ever experienced— and Poe is lost to the darkness._

* * *

He sits up slowly, no longer in control of his own body. No matter how hard he resists, arms and legs move of their own volition. Pushed into a corner of his own mind, he is trapped like a wild animal, furiously trying to escape, to regain control. He watches from inside his prison as his body stands, hands exploring strange flesh in violation and leaving him unclean. He struggles even more, can feel Ren fighting to push him back as his head twists and a sound like none Poe has ever made comes from his mouth.

There is a bright light in the room: Rey is standing before them with her lightsaber. BB-8 is awake, watching from by the door. Poe is trapped, but can still feel his own body moving, the sick smile that crosses his face as Ren faces her. And he can feel the other man's emotions as well, now that Ren is there inside him, so close: anger, fear, and something else.

Ren raises a hand for the for the blaster Poe keeps by his bedside and it flies to him. He raises it toward Rey's chest. She barely moves.

"Really?" she asks. "A blaster against a saber?"

The evil creature inside him laughs, and Poe hears it coming from his own mouth, though it is nothing like his own voice. Rey frowns, rattled by the sound, and looks uncertain. "It's not for you," Ren says, the sound of his voice a strange echo on top of Poe's. "It's for him."

Poe's arm moves slowly toward his temple. He resists from within, fighting hard against the physical impulse to move, and feels the tension in his arm as Ren pushes back, battling for control. Poe knows he's a dead man if Ren pulls that trigger…only it will be Poe's own hand, using his own blaster. He can't imagine a worse way to die, his mind overpowered, his body no longer his own. He stops fighting, centering his strength. The blaster is at his temple, pressing into his skin.

Rey lowers her saber, leaving them in the dark until she calls the lights on. She looks frightened now, like this was not something she had considered. Of course she hadn't, neither had Poe. He can't let this happen to her, let her watch as Ren kills him right in front of her.

He can feel the younger man's anger and hate: for Rey, still touched with something Poe doesn't understand; for Poe, as Leia's surrogate son and Resistance foil; and especially for his mother and her devotion to everything but him. He almost feels sorry for the boy he once met as Ben Solo, until he sees the memory of Han, killed by his own son, eviscerated by red fire. Poe screams, pouring all his rage into it as he wrestles back control of the blaster pointed at his head.

And shoots himself in the leg.

Ren flees, like a ghastly shade retreating before the light, only it is the blistering burn of blaster fire that forces him out as Poe collapses to the ground, gasping in pain. Rey slashes the blaster in half and is there kneeling beside him, babbling nonsense as he tries to breathe through the pain. BB-8 flees, presumably to get medical help. Poe grasps her hand, holds tight.

"He's gone," Poe manages to grind out. "I took a gamble. It was worth it. But if he comes back, you have to—"

Poe goes rigid as he's knocked clear out of his own body. He looks down and sees himself, halfway across the tiny room…but he is ghostly, insubstantial. A spectre of himself. He wonders if he's dead. Then he sees his body, standing up with the ugly wound that he can no longer feel bleeding down his leg. His physical body twists, sneers, and Poe knows: that is not him. That is Kylo Ren.

"Fucking hell," he says, and Rey whirls, her eyes going wide.

"Poe?" she says, and he can only nod. What is there to say? He is no longer in control of his body—he is no longer _inside_ of his body. He is a wraith, an ethereal shadow of himself.

Rey turns back to Kylo Ren. "What did you do?" she snarls. Her lightsaber comes back up as she advances on Ren. Ren shakes his head, the look on his face so ugly that Poe is ashamed his own body can express such malice.

"You attack me now, and Dameron's the one who loses. His body—his life."

"Get out," she shouts. She lowers the saber, raises her hand. Ren lifts the hand that Poe once controlled, and they battle, an invisible conflict within, arms shaking with the effort.

"The pilot's body is strong," Ren murmurs, and Poe feels a strange sense of pride. He is also even more determined to get his body back. He walks—or maybe floats—toward the confrontation. Reaching out, his hands pass right through Ren, who sneers, and laughs, and with a single flick of his other hand, sends Poe straight through the wall into the corridor.

He lands hard in the hallway, though he doesn't actually feel it: it's his mind supplying the description. He stands, almost walks over to his door, then shakes his head and walks right back in through the wall. It is the strangest sensation he's ever experienced, the feeling of moving mentally but not physically.

Rey glances at him, is distracted enough that Ren steps forward and squeezes Poe's right hand before her, catching her undefended. Rey drops her arms and gasps for breath. Ren moves closer; Rey's hands fly to her throat, eyes wide.

"Fight it, Rey!" Poe shouts, and she looks to him in panic. Dammit, there's nothing he can do, he's a ghost trapped outside his body. It's exactly what he was afraid of, that Rey would get hurt trying to help him. He shouldn't have said anything, shouldn't have agreed to let her in. He's going to get her— their best hope for the Resistance—killed, and it's _him_ who's doing it.

"Let her go!" Poe yells at Ren, moving toward them again. "If it's me you want, you've won. Let her go!"

"And miss the chance to frame the best pilot in the Resistance for the murder of the last Jedi, before he kills himself in shame?" Ren croons in Poe's own voice. "And the opportunity to see my mother's best hopes crushed in one blow?" He squeezes his fist harder and Rey falls to her hands and knees. She's dying, and Poe is watching his own body destroy her.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" Poe hisses in anger. "You're sick, and wrong, and—"

The door flies open and two bodies burst in, an aura of power surrounding them. Finn falls to the floor next to Rey. Leia stops before Ren, facing Poe's body. She glances to the side and nods at him; like Rey, she can see him. Somehow, he knows everything will be okay now.

"Ben," Leia says, and her voice is both steel and compassion. "You don't want to do this."

"I already have, _General,_ " he spits back. "You're too late. Your Jedi will die, by your pilot's hand."

"No," Leia says. Calm and sad, she moves closer to her son. "You don't want to do this. And you won't."

"You can't stop me," he sneers. "You're not strong enough."

"You're wrong," she tells him. "The light _is_ strong, Ben. You just have to embrace it."

"I already told you—you're too late!" He shouts, but there is an edge to his words now, and he is clearly struggling to maintain control. Rey is breathing better and looks up at him.

"It's never too late," Rey gasps, and she holds out her hand. Ren looks down at her, raises his hand, squeezes. She collapses onto Finn, who yells at him to stop.

"It was always too late," Ren says, but he is looking at Leia. The pain in his words lances through her, and she flinches. He steps toward her; she shakes her head.

"You can't have them," Leia says, and she moves forward, pushing her hands out with fierce effort. Ren holds up his arms, shouts once, but it is no use: Poe's body collapses to the floor. He winces as if he can feel his head strike the hard metal. Rey sits up, gulping in air and clinging to Finn. Leia stands still, her head bowed.

No one speaks.

"He's gone," Leia finally says, glancing around at all of them, even Poe, still standing outside of his physical self. "And he won't come back. He knows he can't win, not against me."

Finn murmurs something to Rey, then moves over toward Poe's body. "Over here, buddy," Poe says, his voice dry. To his surprise, Finn cocks his head, like he heard.

"Poe?" he asks.

"Oh Poe," Leia says. "I'm so sorry. I'm sorry that he's done this to you, that I—"

"It's not your fault," Poe tells her, voice firm. The one thing he knows more than anything is that it was never Leia's fault. "It's him, only him. His choices." Finn looks around, squinting toward where Poe is still watching the scene from outside his body.

"Kriffing hell," he says, glancing back at Leia. "Is he dead?"

"No," Leia says, and she sounds surprised, watching Finn thoughtfully before gesturing to Poe. "Come here, Poe. I don't know if this will work, but we have to try. You can't fly like that."

Finn straightens Poe's body out on the ground, grabs a pillow and places it under his head. "Thanks, pal," Poe tells him.

"This is really weird," Finn says.

"It's even weirder on my side," Poe tells him. He crouches down beside his body, grimaces at the blaster burn he'd put on his own leg. "That looks painful."

"I'm sure it will be," Leia says, dry tone slowly returning. "But you're better in there than out here." She holds out her hand.

"Are you sure…" Poe meets her eyes. "Are you sure he won't try again?"

"Not tonight," she says, and he believes her. "And I'll make sure it never happens again. Take my hand."

Poe shrugs, figures there is no point in telling her it's not possible. He reaches out…and feels the warmth of her fingers clasp his. He gasps as she smiles at him. "Trust me," she says, and he holds her hand tight.

"I always have," he tells her. He always will. If his voice cracks, he ignores the fact that Rey and Finn are watching. He's been shot in the leg and kicked out of his own body; it's the least of his worries.

Leia bows her head, and Poe feels something in the air around him, something warm and light. Something strong and powerful but clean and pure, nothing like what he felt when Kylo Ren attacked. This must be the light side, the power of love and peace.

"Follow the light, Poe," she says, and Poe feels a tug in his chest, drawing him downward, toward his body. He glances up, sees Rey and Finn watching him, their faces shining with concern and hope. He sees Leia, her eyes bright with both pain and power. He closes his eyes and surrenders to the light, to the trust he has in this remarkable woman, to the love he feels for his friends.

As he settles back into his body, he sinks blissfully into the feeling of physical presence, of skin and bones and blood pumping through his veins and air flowing through his lungs. Of touch and sensation and with it, pain. Which is when he comes to with a gasp and a curse.

"Dammit, that hurts!"

Finn is there, grasping his hand through the pain, and Poe never wants to let go. He is back in his body, free of Kylo Ren, surrounded by light and love.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So many thanks to mssrj_335, who with one little push kickstarted most of this chapter when I got a little stuck! I hope it lived up! Thank you for reading - final chapter in a day or two! :)


	4. Chapter 4

Epilogue

Poe hates being stuck in the medical area, but it's better than going back to his room, at least for one night. He's in bed, lower leg wrapped in a bacta bandage, painkillers keeping him relaxed. Yet he knows sleep won't come soon; there's too much on his mind.

Finn and Rey come in as soon as Kalonia leaves. Finn seems worried and confused, and Rey…Rey looks terrible. There is an ugly red welt around her neck, and she is clearly still angry. Poe can sense that it's not only directed at Kylo Ren, but at herself as well. She tried to help him, faced Kylo Ren, and lost. Somehow, the man had found the strength to not only possess Poe, but to force him from his own body—and then use Poe's body to try and kill Rey. Poe will never forget the image of his own hand choking Rey to death.

He holds out his hand now, and Finn and Rey exchange a look like they don't know who he's reaching for. Poe meet's Rey's eyes first. "I'm okay. You're okay. It's over."

She takes his hand, and he holds tight because he knows she'll let go if he doesn't. "I'm sorry," she says. "I'm sorry I tried to help and couldn't stop him. You were right, I—"

"No, thank you for being there," Poe interrupts. "You faced him, and you fought back, and you didn't let him kill either one of us."

"He took over your body!" she exclaims. "He shot you!"

"No, I shot me," Poe tells her. "I couldn't let him have that blaster. I hoped it would sort of shock him out."

"How'd you end up on the outside looking in?" Finn asks, stepping closer. He puts his hand on Poe's shoulder and gently squeezes, leaves it like he doesn't want to let go.

"How did he get in so fast in the first place?" Rey asks, and Finn shoots her a glare. Poe doesn't mind talking about, not really; it might help him understand better.

Poe rubs his face. "It started out like every other time—I was fighting him off, and then all of a sudden…" He doesn't want to think about it, but they should know. Rey should know. "It was anger—I could feel it, feel how angry he was. It gave him power, like the stories always said. Next thing I knew, I was a zombie."

"And that's when you shot yourself?" Finn asks.

Poe nods. "I was in control for about ten seconds before he booted me out completely, just like that. I didn't even know any that was possible!"

"What was he so angry about?" Finn asks. "You fighting back?"

Poe is silent, looks at Rey. She meets his eye. "It was me, wasn't it?"

"He was furious when he realized you were there," Poe says quietly. "But there was something else, too…I don't know what…"

Rey moves away from them both. "I'm sorry," she says. "I told you, there's some kind of connection through the Force…but I didn't know it would make him stronger if I was there!" She's working herself up to a panic, and Poe sits up, reaches out, while Finn steps toward her. Only she backs away toward the door. "I shouldn't have tried. I'm a danger—to you, to the Resistance, to everyone. I should—"

She turns to leave and crashes right into Leia. She grabs onto the older woman, who in turn steadies Rey and holds tight. "You should turn around and sit down," Leia says, holding Rey's arm firmly and guiding her back toward Poe's bed, pushing her down to sit on the end by his feet. "Because we don't run from danger around here."

"But you saw what happened—you must have heard what Poe said," Rey protests. "It's my fault this happened, that Ren was able to hurt Poe. I let him in and I couldn't stop him!"

"You know, Poe told me earlier it wasn't my fault, what Ben did to you both, and he was right." Leia sighs, looking suddenly so very tired. "Ben makes his own choices. And if it's not my fault as his mother, then it's certainly not your fault."

"But I—"

"Rey, the only thing you did was try to help a friend," Leia says. She pats Rey's hand, then crosses her arms over her chest to glare at Poe. "You, on the other hand…"

"What?" he exclaims. "I'm the one who got shot and possessed!"

Her face softens. "I know. I'm still so sorry he did that to you. How are you?"

"I'll walk," he tells her, earning the eyeroll he'd hoped for. "And you?" he asks softly.

She moves to the side of his bed and takes his hand. "Poe, I'm confused. Why didn't you come to me? Why didn't you tell me what was happening, what he was doing to you?"

Poe swallows, looks wide-eyed at Finn behind her, who shrugs with an "I told you so" expression on his face Poe finds particularly galling. Except Finn was right, and so is Leia in asking. All he can do is offer his honesty.

"I didn't want to hurt you," he says. "I know how hard this is, and I didn't want to add to that burden. I thought I could handle it."

"You mean, you thought you and Rey could handle it," she points out.

"She—" Poe doesn't want to give her up, but she joins in with her own confession.

"I offered to help," she says, glancing at Finn. "We were worried, so I talked to Poe and decided to…well…"

"Show up without a plan," Leia finishes. "You thought you could fight him off, defeat him like you did the first time."

Rey's silence is answer enough.

"Rey, he was injured when you faced him on Ilum. He was distracted when you escaped from Snoke's ship. He's strong. The Dark Side gives him great powers."

"There is still good in him," Rey says. "I know you believe it."

"I'm his mother," Leia says, and Rey simply nods, as if she understands something Poe has missed. "Now Finn here," she starts, and waits a moment. Finn appears nervous, and Poe feels for him. It's no fun being dragged over the coals by Leia Organa.

"Finn is the one who came to me," she says. "He's the one with the good head on his shoulders."

"I ran into BB-8," he admits, looking surprised. "He told me Poe had been shot."

"And why were you walking around in the middle of the night?" she asks. She knows something, Poe can tell from the inflection of her voice. He's heard it too many times to miss.

Finn glances back and forth between her and Poe before answering. "I had a bad feeling."

Leia nods, as if that was the answer she was looking for. "As did I. I didn't recognize it at first, I was trying to understand why I felt Ben so strongly when you came in."

"Thanks, buddy," Poe says. Finn takes a step closer and once again lays his hand on Poe's shoulder. Poe feels grounded and hopes he stays close. "You saved my life, and maybe my soul."

"Yeah, what was that?" Finn asks. "What happened back there, when you were floating around like a ghost?"

"He was so furious when I shot myself that he came back even stronger, threw me out of my own body. It was shocking, to say the least." He never wants to experience the feeling again, of moving without physical form, of being completely powerless to fight back.

"It was awful," Rey says quietly. "Seeing you there, outside of your body. Knowing it was him inside."

"It was awful watching my own hand choke you," he tells her. "I assume he was using the Force?" When she nods, he shakes his head. "I'm so sorry. I'm sorry I got you involved, that I hurt you—"

"It wasn't you!" she exclaims. "Poe, I know that. I would never blame you for what he did."

"So, you're not going to flinch next time I go in for a hug?"

She raises an eyebrow. "Depends on whether or not you showered."

Finn throws his hands up in the air. "Thank you!" he exclaims, motioning between them. "That is the normal we need, not the weird sneaking around."

"We didn't sneak," Poe protests. "I told you exactly what was going on!"

"Next time, tell me," Leia interrupts. "All of you."

Each of them murmurs a "Yes, ma'am," and Leia nods in satisfaction. And then she suddenly looks exhausted.

"We should all try to get some sleep. Rey, I'd like to speak with you some more before we do." She pats Poe on the hand once more. "Get some rest, Poe. You're safe, I promise."

"I know," Poe says, because he believes in her more than anything. She smiles at him, tilts her head toward Finn.

"Maybe Finn can stay with you. In case he has another feeling." Rey gives them both a confused look as she follows Leia out of the medical area, and they wait until they are alone to talk. Poe thinks he knows what Leia was really saying, but that's a long way off, so he changes the subject.

"So why were you wandering around in the middle of the night again?" he asks, hoping his voice sounds teasing.

"I told you before—I had a bad feeling, back in my own bunk. I was debating whether to come down when BB-8 came hurrying up and said you'd been shot and needed medical help."

"But you went to Leia instead," Poe points out.

Finn immediately seems defensive, crossing his arms over his chest and nodding. "Yeah, I did. After what you told me, I figured that's what you needed. _Who_ you needed."

Poe sighs, leaning back on his pillows. "And you were right," he says. "You probably saved both our lives. Thank you."

Finn relaxes, pulls up a chair and moves closer to the bed. "I didn't do anything, that was all the General. I can't imagine how hard that was for her. I still can't believe what I _saw_ down there."

"I can't believe it happened," Poe murmurs.

"You left your body."

Poe nods, is quiet as he thinks about it. About the primal rage he felt, that drove Ren to such power that he could not only take over another man's body, but push his very soul out of it. The feeling of not being able to control his own hand was horrible enough; watching that hand take the life from Rey is something he hopes he never experiences again. The sense of disconnection, the complete lack of power, and the fear that Ren would win and kill them both will haunt him for a long time. The only thing keeping him from complete panic is his faith in Leia that it won't happen again.

"Are you okay?" Finn asks quietly.

"Yeah," Poe says after a moment. "I am. Thanks for your help tonight. It means a lot, that you were there."

"I told you I'd do anything for you," Finn replies. "In fact, if you want to get some sleep, I'm happy to leave, give you some peace and quiet. Or I can stay, keep you company."

"Stay," Poe says, probably too quickly, but he doesn't care at this point, not after all they've been through. He doesn't even mind admitting it. "I could use the company after all that."

"Me too," Finn admits. "Don't think I'd get much sleep on my own, knowing I could get kicked out of my own body now."

"You won't," Poe says without hesitation. "Leia stopped him. She said he won't be back." He hesitates. "Besides, you've already taken him on once. I think you'd kick his ass if he tried anything like that on you."

"Sounds like you did pretty good yourself," Finn says, then smirks. "Even if you had to shoot yourself in the leg."

"Hey!" Poe laughs, because it does sound ridiculous when Finn teases him. "It worked. He was so mad, though. At Leia, and Rey…I don't know what's going on there, but we need to keep an eye on it."

"Okay," Finn says, agreeing readily. "And I'm keeping an eye on you, too."

Poe rolls his eyes. "I told you already, I don't need—"

"I want to," Finn says quietly, leaning forward. "I can't lose you. You saved me, gave me a name and a purpose. You're not leaving that body again. We're gonna beat him, and win."

"Right," Poe says with a fond smile. "And when we win, we all get out more."

"Exactly," Finn says. "I need someone to show me what's out there besides fighting, besides war. This isn't going to last forever. I want to see everything, do everything, go everywhere."

"And you need a pilot?" Poe suggests. His tone is light, but inside, he is touched, moved that Finn would look to him for such a thing.

"Of course I need a pilot," Finn grins. "Why do you think I broke you out?"

"Everything is a tall order, buddy," Poe tells him. Inside, however, he's already making plans. Finn shrugs.

"When this is all over, we'll be free," Finn says. "As far as I can tell, there's nothing we can't do if we're free."

Free. Finn is, of course, referring to freedom from control, from the oppression of the First Order that is spreading across the galaxy, from the responsibility of war. Poe hopes for a different freedom; a freedom from fear and loss, from conflict and regret. Freedom from the nightmares of his past, bought with sacrifice and victory. Once again, Poe feels that burst of hope that Finn's presence inspires. It fills him with confidence and longing, and he nods.

"You're absolutely right, buddy," he says. "And when it's over, I'll take you wherever you want to go. Everywhere."

Finn's smile is as bright as the stars on a dark Yavin night, and Poe feels it deep down, the drive to keep fighting so that they are truly free. Kylo Ren will not take him again, he will not win. One day soon, Poe will be free of the memory of him. Finn will be free to live as he wants and deserves, and Poe will be there, showing him everything.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The end! Let a girl know what you thought? Comments and kudos keep our stories alive and our imaginations creating more – it's no fun shouting into the dark. Thank you for reading!


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